Sep 032016
 

For the last couple months, I haven’t been posting as often. There are several reasons, but the biggest reason is Mirage.

Mirage is our other cat, my husband’s cat. Psycho cat is an apt description of her, but when my daughter was young we called her the clawing-biting-mass-of-silliness. It was often said through clenched teeth in order to keep from saying bad words in front of our young daughter. Thankfully, she’s calmed down with age, but she’s developed some other quirks that are driving me up the wall. 

There are a billion stories about her insane antics, some quite humorous, but I’ll stick to the matter at hand.

Mirage has been waking me up almost every day after only a few hours of sleep. She stands in the bedroom, on my side of the bed, yowling loudly and when I get up to see what’s wrong, she just wanders off. If I go back to bed, she starts in again just as I’m starting to doze off.

I tried to just ignore her, but she never stopped. I tried telling her to stuff it, but she didn’t listen. And I can’t close the bedroom door because Mister Underfoot would have a cow. We’d hear it through the door anyway. Well, I would. The hubby doesn’t always wake up to her yowling.

At first, the yowling was the only thing I noticed because I was half asleep but after a few weeks, I noticed that every time I got up she’d be standing there with a toy mouse in front of her feet. If I pretended to be asleep, she’d pick up the mouse, toss it around, then drop it and start yowling again. So, I tried playing with her. She looked at me like I was insane and walked away only to return and start yowling again as I was drifting back to sleep.

She doesn’t play anymore, so seeing her tossing the mouse around is cute and a little weird. And it’s always the same mouse. Here’s the culprit:

Mirage's Mouse

I’m sure it’s just a coincidence, but the mouse is gray and black like Mister Underfoot. We have other mice just like this one save the color and she never touches them.

Since it’s never any other mouse and it’s the only thing I’ve seen her play with in years, I didn’t want to take it away from her. I took to hiding it before we went to bed and that worked for about a week. I kept waking up anyway because my body was used to waking up after just a couple of hours. I didn’t put the mouse anywhere she couldn’t get to it and eventually she found my hiding place under Mister Underfoot’s blanket. I’m not sure if she actually found it or if Mister Underfoot uncovered it for her. I’m thinking the latter. Either way, the whole thing started all over again.

Now, she carries the mouse around even when we’re not asleep. She carries it to me and drops it at my feet, but if I try to play with her, she still just wanders away. She only yowls when we’re asleep, which means I’m not going totally crazy, but I’m not sure what to do. Every time I hide it, one of the two of them finds it and I still don’t want to take it away from her completely. If I put it somewhere they can’t get to it, I’m afraid I’ll forget to get it back out for her. She has some sort of attachment to this one mouse that I don’t understand, but the yowling has got to stop. I’m tired!

Any suggestions? Take it away from her and set an alarm on the phone reminding me to give it back to her? Let her keep it and put up with it since she’s so attached to it? Buy a hundred of them so maybe she’ll get confused or tired of it?

Mirage

Nov 092015
 

Mister Underfoot loves me. I love him, too. Now can I get some sleep?!

Recently, Mister Underfoot has decided that I’m not allowed to sleep for more than a couple hours at a time. I’m not sure what he’s actually doing, because I’m half asleep, but I wake up with his face a half an inch from mine, his whiskers tickling me.

It was cute… at first.

After days of getting a few hours sleep here and there, always waking up to the tickling of his whiskers, the lack of sleep finally caught up with me. Yesterday, I was so exhausted that I couldn’t function anymore. My calves were killing me like they tend to when I stay up too late and I couldn’t concentrate on writing. I decided to take a nap knowing that I wasn’t going to get more than a few hours sleep thanks to the Whisker Bandit, but I needed to get some rest so I could make word count.

As expected, two hours after I fell asleep, the Whisker Bandit struck again. This time I groaned, rolled over and covered my face with the sheet. I wondered why my addled, half asleep brain hadn’t thought of this before. I was just about to drift back off to sleep when Underfoot stepped up on my head and sat down!

A muffled, “Ahhhh!” escaped me as I pushed him off. Now that I’m awake, I realize how lucky I am that he didn’t freak out and leave me a few painful reminders on my face, his new chair. I’m not sure how I wound up on my feet beside the bed, but I must have tossed the covers off and jumped out of bed. Wide awake now, I gave up on sleep and turned on the light to get dressed. This is what I saw…

underfoot-glare

I don’t know how he wound up wrapped up in the quilt. Maybe it happened when I tossed the covers off or maybe he crawled in there. I couldn’t tell if he was mad at me or if his feelings were hurt. I grabbed my phone and took this pic while explaining to him I wasn’t mad at him, but my face was not a proper place to sit. He just glared.

As I type this he’s in his normal place, on top of my arm trying to prevent me from getting anything done. He’s fifteen pounds of bulk and muscle, but he feels more like fifty. So, he’s not mad at me anymore, he never stays mad for long, and I hope he’s learned his lesson about sitting on my head, but I don’t hold out much hope for more than a few hours of sleep anytime soon.

I wonder if I burn more calories typing with his extra weight on my arm. New writer’s workout? Strengthen your arms and burn extra calories! All natural cat weights!

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